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discussDo You Encourage Independence in Your Kids?
Helping kids become independent while maintaining strong family bonds can be tricky. How do you encourage your children to take on responsibilities and make their own choices?
Encouraging children to take on responsibilities can be easy as you can offer an incentive to do them until it becomes natural for them to do it. An example of this would be an added hour of screentime for doing their laundry or the dishes after a meal. I don't see this any different than what adults have to do for their responsibility as to get a paycheck, you need to put in the hours. So, it not only encourages them to create good habits but also prepares them to become an adult.
As far as choices go, I like to help them choose by thinking about the outcome of their choice along with the potential outcome of my suggested choice. I would like to believe this would give them some critical thinking skills to think through everything before deciding on their own. However, we all make bad choices in life, so I try not to fault them too much for that. Rather, if they make a bad choice, have them think out different scenarios after the fact that could have had a more positive outcome.
As I have a daughter, the scariest is a choice that she can make on her own that will have an ever-lasting and life-changing impact, such as having a baby too early or with the wrong person. You can only go so far with that because kids will be kids, but I hope that she can overcome the peer pressure (or hold back those raging hormones) to think that decision through on her own as I won't be there to help her.
The development of children fundamentally depends on developing their independence. My children receive duties matched to their level. I also let my kids decide independently regarding things like their daily attire, after-school activities etc. That way, they are growing to becoming independent gradually.
In my household, we l utilize a system that gives children more responsibility as they show readiness. The approach begins with basic responsibilities and grows into more independence when children prove their development. The process enables them to claim responsibility for their decisions which will make them develope independence.